Joke 90

During the past year I have tried to make love to you 365 times. I have succeeded 36 times, which is an average of once every ten days. The following is a list of why I did not succeed more often: 54 times the sheets were clean; 17 times it was too late; 49 times you were too tired; 20 times it was too hot; 15 times you pretended to be asleep; 22 times you had a headache; 17 times you were afraid of waking the baby; 16 times you said you were too sore; 12 times it was the wrong time of the month; 19 times you had to get up early; 9 times you said weren't in the mood; 7 times you were sunburned; 6 times you were watching the late show; 5 times you didn't want to mess up your new hairdo; 3 times you said the neighbours would hear us; 9 times you said your mother would hear us. Of the 36 times I did succeed, the activity was not satisfactory because: 6 times you just laid there; 8 times you reminded me there's a crack in the ceilling; 4 times you told me to hurry up and get it over with; 7 times I had to wake you and tell you I finished; 1 time I was afraid I had hurt you because I felt you move. *******************************************************